blaster rules for glitterglog

I heard some folk round these parts were posting about gun's... Well, we don't know what gun's are in Laurentia but we do have blasters, for which my buddy Gigi Gutsygills and I wrote some rules many moons ago that I have, shamefully, neglected to share with my cherished readers for all that time. Let's fix that tonight.

A human blastermaster, made in Hero Forge by yours truly.

A blaster is sort of like a shitass retrofuturistic raygun with a wand for a barrel. I would have reflected this in the above model had Hero Forge a better selection of gun parts from which to kitbash such an implement but it didn't really. 

Blasters are a lot like gun's, but less lethal. A handblaster is analogous to a semiautomatic pistol. A jitterblaster is kind of like a submachine gun. A rattleblaster is a tommy gun; a rayler is a bolt action rifle made of a staff; a boomstick is a shotgun; and a bazinga is a rocket launcher.

There are no nonmagical gun's in this setting.

 

 BLASTER RULES

I need you to understand that I was a Tactical Breach Wizards fan before it ever released. I was one of the motherfuckers who watched every last dev video Tom Francis uploaded in the years prior to its release. This makes me cool and special, and I deserve recognition and accolades for having been excited about an upcoming video game.

 Firing a ranged weapon normally uses your SHREWD for its attack and damage. A range increment is how far a weapon can shoot before incurring penalty to hit -- For example, a handblaster has a -1 penalty if the target is 5 squares from its wielder, a -2 penalty if 9 squares from its wielder, and so on. Most blasters deal damage of a single element.

Blasters have twenty shots until they become dangerous to use. When destabilized in this way, they have a 50% chance to backfire and deal damage to you as well as your target. You can recharge your blasters at no cost when you rest. 

Piranha Launcher, Nick Southam

Handblaster: 1d6+SHREWD or SLICK damage. Range increment 4. One inventory slot.
You get a +1 bonus to hit if you finger-gun in real life as you attack.

Jitterblaster: 1d4+SHREWD. Range increment 4. One inventory slot.
Damage dice explode -- If damage roll is 4, you may expend another charge to roll again and add the damage together. This may continue indefinitely.

Rattleblaster: 1d4+SHREWD. Range increment 3. Two inventory slots.
As well as firing normally, you may alternatively expend three charges to spray and pray in a 3x2 area in front of you. If damage roll is 4, you may expend another charge to roll again and add the damage together. This may continue indefinitely.

Hired Gun, Eric Braddock. This fuckin Hearthstone set was one of the seminal influences on a much earlier version of my setting.

Rayler: 1d10+SHREWD. Range increment 6. Two inventory slots.
Shots pierce in a straight line -- roll to attack each other creature caught in line of fire too. Every target beyond the first takes half damage.

Boomstick: 2d6+SHREWD or STURDY. Range increment 2. Two inventory slots. Loud.
Instead of losing chance to hit with range increment, boomsticks fall off in damage. Costs 2 charges to fire. You gain a +1 to damage if you mime racking a shotgun in real life and make the appropriate sound effect.

Bazinga: 5d4+STURDY. Range 4. Three inventory slots. Loud.
Damage every target in a 3x3 area centered on any square within four squares of the wielder. If you are yourself caught in the explosion, you may reposition yourself up to [SUM] feet in the direction of your choice. Bazingas require a 1-point action to reload after every fire, and cost 5 charges to fire.

Also, I think Walfalcon's ska word gun's are a great idea but vehemently disagree that a gun named after Stupid Horse would prioritize and value nonlethal conflict resolution and have a distaste for killing. Stupid Horse is not an especially nonlethal song, not by nature. Thus I leave you here with a sentient blaster of my own.

STUPID HORSE

Stupid Horse is a sawn-down rayler; for all mechanical purposes, treat it as a handblaster that takes up two inventory slots. Scrawled in permanent marker on its handguard are the words "LIVE FAST DIE LATER". A keychain charm of a dinky little misshapen horse hangs from its stickerbombed stock.

WANTS: motion movement the thrill of the chase
DISLIKES: stasis and languidity

Stupid Horse deals an extra point of damage for every step you travel the turn you fire it. It gains a +2 to hit when fired from a moving vehicle or steed. When it is unhappy, it fires with a -10 to hit.

all according to keikaku (GlitterGLOG class: SCOUNDREL (or, Heist Movie Rogue))

SCOUNDREL

 

An orc scoundrel. Made in Hero Forge by yours truly.

 

“There is honor among thieves. What of you, pig?”

 

Starting Equipment:

-a set of slightly rumpled formalwear (light armor) (1 slot);

-a fancy knife (light sharp) OR an engraved handblaster (scary) (1 slot);

-a fake ID card from an establishment of your choice (0 slots)

-2 rations worth of goat cheese and crackers (2 slots)

Level 1: always prepared, you mean this?
Level 2: kitty’s got claws, artful dodger

Level 3: i've been expecting you, dramatic infiltration
Level 4: i steal his pockets

Always Prepared: When shopping, you may spend any amount of gold or barter to buy an Unlabelled Package. When the package is unwrapped, you declare what it contains, as long as the contents comprise the appropriate number of inventory slots, don’t cost more than you originally paid, and could feasibly be purchased. You can put multiple items inside a large Unlabelled Package, including a smaller Unlabelled Package. You can have up to two Unlabelled Packages at a time.

You Mean This?: Once per rest, you may retroactively declare that you stole something you plausibly could've taken from someone you got in close with by swapping it with an item of similar size that was in your inventory at the time.

By Evyn Fong.

 

Kitty’s Got Claws: You may always declare that you have a knife (light sharp -1) hidden somewhere on you. Even if your inventory is empty, you can reveal one as long as you’re wearing anything at all.

Artful Dodger: Once per combat per opponent, you may declare that you coolly sidestep a melee attack and reposition yourself one square diagonally from your current position.

 

I've Been Expecting You: At the start of an encounter resulting from the Heat Clock, you may explain how you knew the other party were coming. Your crew gets a guaranteed surprise round during this encounter. You may use this ability once per dungeon run. (Leaving and re-entering the same dungeon will allow you to use this ability again.)

Dramatic Infiltration: At any time you're not in immediate danger, you may declare that you are walking offscreen. While offscreen in this way, you may reveal yourself to have been a minor NPC in the background of any scene all along, as long as there actually are minor NPCs in the background of the scene. You can always walk back on stage at any time. This ability is limited by plausibility.

I Steal His Pockets: Replace the word “plausibly” in You Mean This? with “physically.”

When you retire a level 4+ scoundrel, you may later declare at any time that any single item from the retired scoundrel’s inventory was secretly placed into another player character’s all along. You may do this only once.

 

 Notes

this class has laid languishing in my drafts for like six months. i've had this queued since back when i was in college. i've been obsessively editing it ever since without sharing it. wrong with me, frankly. it's out here in the world. if there's anything more wrong with it i'll fix it with reception and feedback in mind instead of getting neurotic like this again. more posts soon. more posts soon. 

 

Chi Wen Tzu used to playtest his rules before posting them. The Master, hearing of this, said, "Writing them out is quite enough."